Everyone Wants to Be Normal…But What Is Normal in a Relationship?

As human beings, we all have a deep-seated desire to belong, to connect with others, and to be accepted for who we are. For many of us, the way we measure our “normalcy” or level of acceptance comes from conforming to the norms of society. And this includes how we approach romantic relationships.

But what if I told you that there really is no “normal” when it comes to relationships? Every couple is different, and what works for one couple may not work for another. In fact, chasing after someone else’s idea of normal may not only be futile but also detrimental to the success of your own relationship.

So, let’s take a closer look at some of the typical relationship timelines and whether or not you should measure your relationship up against them.

1. First Date

If we’re being honest, this is the foundation of all romantic relationships. The first date is usually when you decide whether or not you want to pursue a romantic relationship with someone. And while some couples start out as friends and don’t even have an official “first date,” most of us do.

Ultimately, though, it doesn’t really matter how you got to the first date stage as long as you’re both interested in each other.

2. First Kiss

There’s no rulebook that says you have to kiss someone on the first date or any date for that matter. It’s really up to you and your personal comfort level. But if you do decide to go for it, just be sure you’re both on the same page.

3. First Few Dates

At this point, you’re probably still getting to know each other and trying to decide if the other person is worth your time. Some people may feel that they need to spend more time together before committing to a relationship, while others may feel that they know what they want pretty quickly.

The important thing here is to communicate clearly with each other and not make any assumptions about where the relationship is headed.

4. Dating

Once you’ve agreed that you’re interested in each other and want to continue seeing each other, that’s when you’re officially “dating.” This could be a tricky phase, as one person may assume that you’re dating exclusively while the other may not.

Again, clear communication is key.

5. Honeymoon Phase

If things continue to progress, you will likely enter the honeymoon phase of the relationship. This is where you are completely infatuated with each other and everything is perfect. You may overlook any flaws and see your partner through rose-colored glasses.

Just keep in mind that this phase doesn’t last forever, and eventually you’ll need to start facing the reality of the relationship.

6. See Each Other’s Homes

At some point, you’ll likely start spending more time together and hanging out at each other’s homes. This is a big step, as it makes you more vulnerable and exposes you to more of each other’s personal lives.

7. Dating Exclusively

Just because you’re dating someone doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re both ready for a committed, exclusive relationship. This is a conversation that should take place sooner rather than later so that there are no misunderstandings.

8. Meet Friends

Introducing your partner to your friends is a big step, as it shows that you’re serious about the relationship. It’s also a good opportunity to see how well your partner fits in with your friend group and vice versa.

9. Committed Relationship

Dating exclusively doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re both ready for a committed relationship. It’s important to talk about your long-term goals and whether or not you see yourselves together in the future.

10. Honeymoon Phase Ends

As we mentioned earlier, the honeymoon phase doesn’t last forever. The infatuation and excitement of the early stages fades away, and it’s up to you to figure out whether or not you’re still compatible.

11. Meet Family

If things are serious and you think the relationship could last, it’s time to start introducing your partner to your family. It’s also important to take things slow and introduce them to your siblings and parents before introducing them to your children (if you have any).

12. Have Sex

There is no “right” or “wrong” answer when it comes to having sex. Some people prefer to wait until they’re in a committed relationship, while others may be more open to having sex earlier on in the relationship.

The most important thing is to make sure that you’re both on the same page and that you’re both comfortable with whatever decision you make.

13. Sleeping Over

Just like with sex, when you start sleeping over at each other’s houses is a very individual choice. Some people prefer to sleep together right away, while others may wait months or even years.

The important thing is to make sure that you’re both comfortable and that you’re both clear about what sleeping over means in the context of your relationship.

14. Travel Together

Traveling together can be a great opportunity to get to know each other on a deeper level. However, it’s also a challenging time for most couples, especially if they aren’t used to living together.

15. Living Together

For some couples, living together before marriage is a must, while others prefer to wait until they’re married. There is no right or wrong answer, but it’s important to take things slow and make sure that you’re both ready for this step.

16. Engaged

Deciding to get engaged is a big step, and the timeline can vary widely. Some couples get engaged after just a few months of dating, while others may wait years or even decades. What’s important is that both people are on the same page about what the engagement means and what their long-term goals are.

17. Married

Once you’re engaged, the next step is to get married. And again, everyone’s timeline for this can be different. You may decide to have a big wedding, a small wedding, or no wedding at all.

18. Kids and Beyond

If you want kids, this is naturally the next step after getting married. But having children is difficult on many couples, and it’s important to make sure that you’re both ready for the challenges that come with parenthood.

So, what’s the bottom line? The best timeline for your relationship is the one that works for you and your partner. Don’t feel pressured to conform to anyone else’s idea of what a “normal” relationship looks like. The only thing that matters is that you both feel happy, loved, and fulfilled in your relationship.