Hold fast to dreams: Five hazardous habits that kill your life’s dream
Langston Hughes beautifully said, “Hold fast to dreams, for if dreams die, life is a broken-winged bird that cannot fly.” Every individual has dreams to achieve in their lifetime. Dreams keep us going even during the hopeless hours of life. However, unknowingly we pile up habits that become the killer of our Life’s Dream. These habits become so involved within our personalities that they become our inherent traits, making us weak and fragile, always providing us with an excuse to let go of our dreams. This article will discuss five hazardous habits that kill your Life’s Dream.
1. Fear of the Unknown
Characteristics: A person with the fear of the unknown is always surrounded by various kinds of fears, i.e. fear of rejection, fear of separation or loss, humiliation, and fear of extinction. These fears are always in the mind, preventing them from taking certain steps towards their dreams, taking risks, and always enjoying their comfort zone.
Reason: The fear of the unknown is a mind condition that is conditioned from childhood. As a child, we have constantly been told not to do certain things, or else something bad would happen. These fears slowly start to build up in our mind, preventing us from doing certain activities that we enjoy. We are afraid of being ridiculed or being termed crazy by society. Therefore, we never start anything afresh, killing our dreams to rest.
2. Addiction to Pain
Characteristics: A person addicted to pain no longer follows their heart’s voice, their inner-conscious. They live just to perform certain social responsibilities, but their inner joy is no more. Everything around them is fake and useless, including human emotions. Their dreams have no meaning, and they are mere fantasies.
Reason: The suffering caused by our daily stressful and busy life enhances the pain in our body, which we mostly try to resist but sometimes, we become so prone to distress in our life that we start dwelling in our own pain delightfully. We start rejoicing in the sympathy arising from our pain. In a way, we become addicts to pain that generates sympathy for us either from others or from ourselves. This addiction can become so hazardous that it can lead us to total hopelessness or dismal for life.
Characteristics: A person who procrastinates is always waiting for a convenient time to fulfill their dreams. They are never certain of the present time and delay their dreams and goals for the future. They are the ones always waiting for the right opportunity, rather than creating one.
Reason: Procrastination has become a part of everyday life now. We ward off certain things for tomorrow, but with time, procrastination can become second nature. We keep on delaying our hopes and dreams for the future as if we are certain that tomorrow would be a better time, even though we are not even certain of our existence in the coming moment. This is because we are not confident enough in the present moment or sometimes, it is due to laziness. We feel tired, exhausted, or we might be looking for perfection. But whatever the reason may be, procrastination is avoiding our present problems and saving them for our future life.
4. Living with Ego
(Note: please don’t confuse ego with pride.)
Characteristics: A person living with a false identity of themselves connects their possessions, whether tangible or intangible, as their own self. For example, their latest smartphone, their collection of high-end clothes and accessories, their relationship with loved ones, etc. On losing these possessions, such a person feels hopeless, as these are their extended self and without which they feel incomplete, taking them further away from their life’s dreams.
Reason: With the start of our lives, we acquire this thing called ego. At first, we connect our identity with our toys, and if that toy was broken, we would start crying because we perceived that toy as our extended self. With time, this ego started widening the boundaries of our perceived self not only in objects but also in relationships, knowledge, and our physical appearances. And the moment someone tries to attack our egos, we become aggressive, which is also the cause of various arguments. For some people, this ego takes a larger-than-life form. As these people put their dreams on a backseat, they live in the pain of not fulfilling their dreams instead of following them. These people foresee themselves as weak and sometimes quit their current situation, thus moving miles away from their dreams.
5. Dwelling in the Past
Characteristics: A person living in the past is never in the present moment. They are always busy thinking about something that happened before and how they reacted or what someone else thought about what they said to them. Absent-mindedness is their starkest personality trait.
Reason: We all have certain conversations in our minds about past events. But when it becomes so frequent that we are always engrossed in thoughts about why they said that, why we reacted like that, or why we should have done this over that, then we are dwelling in our past. We are more concerned with what already happened, and this could take us away from the present moment. Dwelling in the past moments, good or bad, frequently can be hazardous for our future dreams, as it will not spare any time to make an action plan for our future endeavors. Our aspirations and dreams depend on our action plans that need to be made in the present, not on past moments.
The above five behavior patterns or habits are present in either smaller or bigger form in all of us. The first step to bring such hazardous habits under control is through awareness in ourselves. The moment we become aware of them and their effects on our lives, we consciously become free of their ill effects. Therefore, we need to pursue our dreams with full awareness and let success befall our lives with joy.