As human beings, we are all rookies in life. We spend our days navigating through this complex world, trying to make sense of it all, while simultaneously trying not to bump into each other. It’s a daunting task, to say the least. However, despite our limitations, we are entrusted with one of the most important tasks known to mankind – raising babies. It’s a scary thought, but as parents, we are required to impart wisdom, set rules, and instill confidence in our children, so that they can navigate through life with all the tools they need to thrive.

When Evan Porter found out that he was about to become a father, he was understandably fearful. He held a six-pack of beer in his hand, anticipating the moment when his wife would break the news to him. He never imagined that he would be standing in his dark, half-packed apartment, facing the reality that he was about to become a father. The news hit him hard. His wife held two pregnancy tests, tears streaming down her face, and all Evan could think about was the fantasy football draft that they were about to miss.

Evan’s first reaction to the news of his wife’s pregnancy was to open a beer. It was a humorous response to a terrifying realization – he was completely unprepared to be responsible for another human being. He was frightened by the thought of having to raise a child, someone who would look up to him for guidance and support. He was scared of the future, and all the uncertainties that it held.

As Evan thought more about the things that he would need to impart to his child, he realized that he embodied none of them. Evan’s values were not aligned with the things that he wanted to teach his child. His thoughts were a mixture of contradictory beliefs and half-baked ideas. He realized that he was a terrible father. However, despite his self-doubt, he still had a list of things that he wanted to teach his child.

Evan’s list contained 14 reasons why he sucked as a father. The list included things like speaking your mind, working hard in school, cleaning your room, being dedicated to your talents, and not waiting too long to get comfortable in your own skin. The list was a mix of idealistic and pragmatic beliefs, things that Evan believed were important for his child to learn.

Evan’s list also included things like paying attention to the news and politics, being ruthless, not texting and driving, and always putting family first. In essence, Evan wanted his child to be a well-rounded and successful individual who was also compassionate and empathic towards others. Evan knew that he had a long way to go, but he hoped that he could instill these values in his child, even if he himself was not the best example.

Evan’s final point on the list was perhaps the most important. He wanted his child to know that no matter what happened, he would love them. Even if his child fell short in anything, Evan would still be their loving father. This was a reminder that, despite all of our failings and imperfections, we have the capacity to love unconditionally.

Through all of his fears and doubts, Evan realized that he wasn’t alone. He could always rely on his wife for support and guidance. Even on the night when they received the news of their pregnancy, his wife’s response was a humorous reminder of why they fell in love in the first place. She reminded him that, despite their flaws, they could still create something beautiful together.

In conclusion, parenting is a challenging task that requires us to be patient, empathetic, and loving. It’s a task that none of us are fully prepared for, but despite our shortcomings, we can still impart valuable lessons to our children. Evan’s list is a reminder that we are all human and that we all have our failings. However, we can still strive towards being the best parents we can be, even if we don’t always live up to our own expectations. In the end, what matters most is that we love our children unconditionally and that we do everything we can to help them succeed in life.