Killer Negotiator 101: Understanding the Art of Win-Win Negotiation

Negotiation is an art that requires tact, skill, and tremendous patience. It’s not about winning at all costs, but rather finding a solution that benefits all parties involved. A good negotiator might get a deal for himself, but a killer negotiator creates a win-win situation. In this article, I will be sharing some of my personal experiences as a negotiator and explaining some key concepts that can help you become a master negotiator.

1. Believing Everyone Is a Good Guy

Whether you are Bill Gates or a New York City cab driver, you have a philosophy- an internal code of what is right, what is wrong, what is enjoyable, what is not, etc. It is your unique collection of beliefs and behaviors. However, to be a killer negotiator you must remember that often you may be trying to convince another person using the yardstick you have prepared for yourself. That may not work very well for you.

Conflict of Concepts

People from different cultures have different experiences that shape their beliefs and ideas. As a result, it’s essential to understand the concept of conflict of concepts. Understanding this concept means the ability to empathize with the other person’s point of view and try to see things from their perspective. This skill can be challenging, but it is necessary if you want to become a killer negotiator.

How to use this as a negotiator

A killer negotiator understands that everyone believes they are good guys, and they use this knowledge to their advantage. Even a terrorist is a crusader to himself. A thief is desperate, and to him stealing seems like a logical way out. A killer negotiator understands that their beliefs are just as strong in their minds as the other person’s ideas are to him or her. Therefore, they need to take a neutral approach and put themselves in the other person’s shoes to understand where they’re coming from.

2. The Weird People Around You

As a negotiator, you will encounter all kinds of people with different personalities, ethics, and beliefs. It’s crucial to be open-minded and respectful of others’ beliefs, even if they differ significantly from your own.

Action Plan: Learn More than You Teach

When you are a negotiator, you need to be prepared to handle people who differ from you. Instead of trying to teach them, it’s essential to learn from them. A killer negotiator listens carefully to what the other person says and looks for points of agreement. They keep an open mind and try to find ways to accommodate the other party’s demands.

It’s Not the Time to Teach; It’s Time to Learn

In other words, the killer negotiator avoids conflicts and arguments. Instead, they focus on understanding the other person’s philosophy, creating a common ground, and finding ways to work together. When you take the time to understand someone else’s beliefs, you can better appreciate their perspective.

3. Hit the Problem from the Other Side of the Table

The way to fight resistance is not with resistance. The only way to disarm opponents is to understand their philosophy and figure out why they feel that way. You can counter the idea only when you truly understand it. That is the only way to be a master negotiator. Do not hit the person; hit the philosophy, and the person will agree with you.

By showing empathy, understanding the other person’s beliefs, and avoiding conflicts, you can become a killer negotiator. Negotiation is not about winning or losing. It’s about creating a win-win situation where both parties can benefit.

In conclusion, negotiation is an important skill in both personal and professional life. The key to becoming a killer negotiator is to understand the other person’s perspective and beliefs, listen carefully, and cooperate to create a win-win situation. It’s not about being aggressive or combative. Instead, it’s about creating mutual respect and understanding. By following these tips, you can become a master negotiator and achieve success in all aspects of your life.